One Very Special Disclosure Survey

After losing a slew of dictator-connected advisors in the last week, the McCain campaign has finally decided it might be a good idea to vet the people hanging out with John McCain.

McCain campaign manager Rick Davis moved to avoid a recurrence of the situation with his conflict-of-interest policy, released late yesterday. It also sought to stem the impression that McCain’s campaign is run by lobbyists — a characterization Democrats have tried to make since it was reported that a senior adviser, Charlie Black, made lobbying calls from McCain’s signature bus, the Straight Talk Express. Davis himself is currently on leave from his lobbying and consulting firm, and the campaign removed two other officials this week for work they’d done on behalf of Burmese junta.


The memo establishes a new vetting process, requiring campaign aides to fill out a questionnaire on their status and to provide proof to the campaign legal department that they’ve terminated outside contracts.

In an show of civic responsibility, Progressive Media USA has filled out the forms for five of McCain’s top advisors. Here, for example, is part of Charlie Black’s now-completed survey:

McCain Staff Lobbyist Survey

NAME: Charlie Black

CAMPAIGN ROLE: Senior Political Adviser

Have you ever registered as a federal lobbyist?

Have you ever been a registered foreign agent?

Please list all of the foreign governments, political and other interests you lobbied for:
Jonas Savimbi (leader of UNITA rebels in Angola)


Government of Zaire

Please list any clients you think could potentially cause a conflict of interest for the McCain Campaign:
Yukos Oil
Philip Morris
JP Morgan
Johnson & Johnson
United Technologies
Washington Mutual Bank
U.S. Smokeless Tobacco
Occidental Petroleum Group
Lincoln Group
Lockheed Martin
National Association of Mortgage Brokers
Ocean Duke Corp.
SAP America

Please list the times you have lobbied Senator McCain or his office:

See how helpful that is? Transparency is a wonderful thing.

Only, McCain’s campaign forgot to ask for disclosure from one additional source of conflicts of interest. So, out of my own sense of civic responsibility, I’ve started to fill out the very special survey the campaign forgot:

McCain Staff Lobbyist Survey

NAME: Cindy McCain


List Total Net Worth

Please list all campaign donations provided that have not been fully reimbursed:

Six months of flights on the Sugar Momma Express
One large barbecue at my Sedona "ranch"

(More to come as "the base" requires it)

Please list all past or present investments that directly undermine a stated McCain campaign promise:
American Funds Europacific Growth fund
American Funds Capital World Growth and Income

(others to be filled in after the AP discovers them)

Please list all business partnerships with corrupt owners of savings &loans, mortgage banking firms, or other financial institutions for which Senator McCain has done legislative favors:

Charles Keating

(others to be filled in after the AP discovers them)

Please list all business partnerships with business owners that have or will be bailed out at taxpayer expense:

Charles Keating

(others to be filled in after the AP discovers them)

Please list any products you sell that offend the cultural sensitivies of a significant portion of the Republican base:


Wait. This isn’t working. There are just too many potential conflicts to fit into one simple survey. There must be an easier way of vetting the Sugar Momma‘s improper conflicts.

Thankfully there is, though it’s an invention of evil big government. For easy vetting and disclosure, the McCain camp might want to try this.

26 replies
  1. TobyWollin says:

    “ stem the impression that McCain’s campaign is run by lobbyists…” The impression? The impression? Wow. Let’s try to put some lipstick on this pig, why don’t we – it’s not an impression – it’s the God’s honest truth here.

  2. Loo Hoo. says:

    Sugar momma going to look even more embarrassed about throwing money down the toilet than Mrs. Romney.

  3. FormerFed says:

    It is remarkable (am I naive or not!!) to live in Tucson and have to read about all the favors (I mean constituent service) that McCain has done for Don Diamond (very big builder in Tucson)in the NYT. The local MSM are oblivious – they say they have covered all this over the years and therefore it is “old news”.

    We need a new tag for McCain – maybe McLobbyist or McIOnlyTalktoDeepPockets, etc.

    • bmaz says:

      It must be the water (or maybe lack thereof?) down there; I have known about the Diamond stuff for a long time. McCain’s actions wouldn’t be all that shocking if not for his constant claim and reputation as the maverick anti-special interest guy crap. Diamond himself is far from the worst guy in the world; although he is a pretty shrewd and hard nosed businessman.

  4. bmaz says:

    Well, I have been protesting “Evil Cindy” for years by drinking only foreign and micro brewed beer. See, I am a team player here!
    (Granted, this may be as absurd as Boosh’s golf bit, but….)

    • Hmmm says:

      Oh good, it wasn’t just me then. Oh wait, that’s worse, isn’t it?…

      “Forbidden” to access, indeed! Why the very idea of it…

      • bobschacht says:

        Oh good, it wasn’t just me then. Oh wait, that’s worse, isn’t it?…

        “Forbidden” to access, indeed! Why the very idea of it…

        Yeah, I was forced by this “error” window to do some real work for a while.

        Bob in HI

      • stagemom says:

        i thought EW didn’t like my light-weight comment over at DK this a.m. and so i was verboten.
        like, i need to get me some more serious-like comments, like.

        • skdadl says:


          I thought that was me too. And I’m an alien — no habeas corpus for me (which is probably why I was banned, or so I was thinking). Oh, denial of service is very hard on a guilt-ridden Presbyterian.

      • Minnesotachuck says:

        Whew! It wasn’t just me either. And that awesome comment I was drafting is now in that Great Bit Bucket in the Sky!

  5. earlofhuntingdon says:

    Lurking Moderator:

    That was thspecial. Denial of Service to FDL/EW for about an hour. Even now, the sign-on function remains glitchy. No, it’s not my machine or connection. Works fine on at least half a dozen other sites.

    Whatsa matter, too many accurate descriptions of the quality of work done by Mr. Chertoff or Mr. McConnell?

    • Hmmm says:

      OT (like my previous, sorry for not tagging it as such) — Lots longer than an hour here. Dear Kindly LurkMod, please ask The Powers for a communication to We Who Merely Comment about whatever happened today, whenever they can. (Inquiring minds, etc.)

    • Hmmm says:

      OT – Not just clogged, I think something else may have been up. What we got was the 403 Forbidden error page from the web server. So our computers were able to reach the FDL computer(s), which wouldn’t have been possible if da toobz had been clogged, and the web server program was up and running running. But for some reason, it lost track of the files that make up the FDL websites’ contents, and as a result the sites couldn’t be served out to us. Further clues: I used the link in the 403 page to try to send the FDL webmaster an email during the outage, but that email bounced… though immediately thereafter I was able to successfully ping the FDL computer(s)… which is weird. In summary, the FDL computer(s) were evidently up, but the various programs running on them (web server, email server) either had not been started, or else were not running correctly, or else not configured correctly.

      If I had to guess, I’d say there was a hardware failure, and they had to bring a whole new computer up, and then restore the site contents from the most recent backup image made sometime earlier today.

  6. bmaz says:

    Alright now Wheelers and Wheelies, I know you are all concerned, because you know, the management here is so oppressive (I think Jodi/JodiDog is the only one banned so far); but it is general bugginess with the whole FDL site probably associated with all the boffo new content being added. There is a lot of way cool good stuff going on, Marcy and I are affected the same as you; be patient. It’s all good.

    • earlofhuntingdon says:

      You have, of course, reared a pack that has learned never to respond to the command of, “Just trust me”, or to pepper spray or those nice fat stakes we’re all looking forward to at the next FDL/EW barbecue. Beer? Well, neither Pavlov nor Skinner learned to desensitize their hounds to that.

      • earlofhuntingdon says:

        Unintentional play on words. Joe Wilson’s recent comment notwithstanding, I’d prefer a steak with FDL’ers rather than its homonym with a Gooper.

  7. Telebro says:

    If McSlime had all of his lobbyist campaign staff complete this survey and make it public, the “maverick” label would come to have a new meaning – more related to an out-of-control outlaw. We have had eight years of thievery and extortion. It is time for change we can believe in.

  8. siri says:

    Would a credit check help them? I just know many people in America have to go through a credit check before they are hired. Or before they rent housing.

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