April 6, 2013 / by bmaz


Final Four Championship Trash Talk


Well, I was two for two in my predictions for the semi-final games Saturday. Considering the poor quality of my prognostications lately, that is smokin hot. So, I am back for more! The scouting really has not changed; Louisville still has the three headed punch and the big game skilz of Rick Pitino. the bo Merlots from Ann Arbor still have a freaking lights out assassin in Trey Burke and quality support in Hardaway, Nik Stauskas and Glen Robby Three Matchsticks.

The line tonight at press is Louisville -4. That sounds about right going in. The Wolverweenie fans are all yammering about whether or not Chris Webber will appear for a Fab Five reunion tonight. I, however, think it appropriate to call time out on that. Pitino, on the other hand, is trying to sell his troops that they are NC State Wolfpack like underdogs. That’s, shall we say, a little much.

Winner: Fuckin A, it’s gotta be THE BO MERLOTS!

[Special Championship music by the one, the only, Mr. John Cash. Yippy Yi Yoh!]

It seems every sporting season is so painfully stretched out now to milk the consuming public. The Super Bowl is now into February, The World Series into the cold winter of November and the NBA playoffs seem to take half a year. And here we are with “March Madness” about to enter the second week of April. With that bit of complaining out of the way, let’s take a look at what is left in the Final Four.

The first semi-final is Wichita State v. Louisville. The Shockers are not quite as shocking as their name suggests; they have had a marvelous tournament and deserve to be here. They are relentless on the glass, have size, speed and get on frequent lights out streaks from behind the three line. Hey, seriously, they took out both top seed Gonzaga and Ohio State on the road to Atlanta, that is pretty heady stuff. But this is Louisville’s second straight trip to the Final Four, and Rick Pitino has a flair for the big stage. He also has a triumvirate of studs from guard Russ Smith, to forward Chane Behanen to center Gorgui Dieng. The Cardinals are 10.5 point favorites. I think it will be closer than the spread, but Louisville moves on.

The second game today is the one of local interest, the one with Marcy’s Bo Merlots taking on the Orange Crush of Syracuse. Man, this one has even grouchy old me excited, and the best is clearly saved for last. Boeheim’s vaunted zone versus Trey Burke, the Big Blue one man zone buster. Wow, am really looking forward to this game. As is their Famous Fabulous Five Freputation, Michigan is loaded with young guns. Syracuse is a veteran group led by junior forward C.J. Fair and sophomore guard Michael Carter-Williams. Yes, that is what qualifies for “veteran in today’s NCAA Tournament, sad as it may be. The men in the Tim Hardaway family tree are known for mouthing off when they should have kept their idiot yaps shut, and Junior, a junior guard for the Merlots, is at it again, albeit it in a less homophobic way.

Syracuse is representing for the rump of what the mighty Big East once was. Jim Boeheim has made quite clear this will not be his last dance. But, it is the end of an era in college basketball. The line is Michigan -2. The talent portion of this pageant is on the Wolverweenies side, and with preparation, zones can be busted. I think the once and future promise of the wholesale raiding of West Virginia by the monsters in Ann Arbor pays off and Beilein and the boys in Blue make a beeline for Monday’s Championship game.

Music today by the J. Geils Band. One Last Kiss for the Final Four. Cut the nets down bitchezz!

Copyright © 2013 emptywheel. All rights reserved.
Originally Posted @ https://www.emptywheel.net/2013/04/06/final-four-trash-talk/