Rumble at the Big House Trash Talk

[As a reminder, it is fundraising week Chez Emptywheel. Please help support our work if you can.]

[special Live Update From the America’s Cup below]
We are only a week into real football and already there is a blockbuster game on tap. The Fighting Irish are going up the country to visit the Big Blue Bo Merlots at the Big House. Lotta B’s in that sentence, but it is hard to give these two teams A’s! (Thanks, I will be here all week, enjoy the veal). Well, at least this game is not in the ignominious class of the 2007 game, which was a scintillating battle of unvictorious and untied loser teams. So, there is that.

Now, what should we expect when expecting this mammoth matchup? For one thing, some great trash talking! And, man, there has already been some prime trashing going on behind the ESPN Gameday set in Ann Arbor. Check out the sign this guy has to greet the blighted Irish:

Play like your girlfriend is real today

Hahahahaha, oh man my side hurts. As an extra bonus, the Game Day folks were just discussing the Arizona v. UNLV game, and all picked “Rich Rod’s team”. The boos from the Michigan cognoscenti about shook the earth at the mention of Rich Rod. Some bonus trash from the Big Mitten: Michigan coach Brady Hoke slams Johnny Football by saying the reigning Heisman winner wouldn’t even be starting were he on the Big Blue. Whoa! Also, Notre Dame, in apparently the only way they could find to show that they can rock and roll, have added Bon Jovi’s kid as a walk on cornerback on their roster.

Since the NCAA put in their overtime rules, I guess someone has to win this game. My friend Armando (who weekly does a series of picks at Talk Left) has the Domers and the 4 points. Naw, Big Blue all the way baybee! Also on tap today is Jim White and Armando’s Florida Gators hooking up in South Beach with the Miami Hurricanes. This game is far from what it once might would have been, but still could be good. Canes in a big home upset. The other really sweet matchup is South Carolina at Georgia. Clemson clocked the Bulldogs in the first week. Hard to see the Dawgs going 0-2 to start the year, but I am rolling with the ‘Ole Ball Coach and his Cocks.

Well then, off to the NFL we go. The only game of note in the pros is The Cheese versus The Niners. Is san Fran as good as they looked last year? Does Colin Kaepernick have too many weapons now that he has Anquan Boldin to go with Vernon Davis and Frank Gore et. al? Who in the world is playing on Green Bay’s offensive line at this point and what will the Pack do for a QB when Aaron Rodgers gets his clock cleaned because of that porous O-Line? This REALLY pains me to say it, but Niners roll at home.

Couple of other pro games of note, namely the Sunday and Monday Night games. SNF is the Gents at the Owboys. Jerry Jones says he is so excited he has insomnia. Think Good Eli will show up to give Jerry indigestion too? Not me, nope this is early in the season and the Cowboys will dredge up some more usual hollow hope for the hometown. But they play again, and Eli will own that one. On MNF we have teh Iggles at the Skins. The much awaited debut of the Chip Kelly Quack Attack run by Mike Vick in the NFL, and the return of the rebuilt RGIII. This is a very tough call. Slight edge to Skins because they are at home, Kelly needs time to have his offense gel and Philly’s defense is a question mark. If vick stays healthy and productive though, watch out. A real sleeper game is the Cardinals at the Rams. Both teams are WAY improved. Watch out for Larry Fitzgerald now that he has Carson Palmer instead of a string of scrubs throwing to him, and the Card’s defense should be solid once again.

Lastly, this weekend is the Italian Grand Prix. There are a few MUST watch races on the Formula One calendar, and Monza is at the top. It always is, but there may be weather Sunday, which could seriously skew things and turn it into really compelling theatre. I was up for qualifying this morning and am sad to report the Red Bulls, led by Sebastian Vettel, have locked out the front row. Nico Hulkenberg surprisingly got his Sauber into P3, with Felipe Massa and Fernando Alonso in P4 and P5 respectively. The buzz everywhere is that this race, at effectively Ferrari’s home track, will likely decide Massa’s future. Out qualifying Fernando is a good start, but the result is what will matter. Massa is almost certainly driving for his future in F1 at all with Kimi Raikkonen’s potential return to Maranello lurking. The one thing in Massa’s favor is that Alonso wants no part of Kimi returning to the fold. Should be an interesting race and it goes off at 8:00 am EST on NBCSports.


ACRace 2This is from our very own fearless Emptywheel Roving Reporter Rosalind, hot off the wires!

“Greetings Wheelies! it is I Rosalind, Roving Reporter. The Emptywheel
assignment editor forced me to spend the weekend in San Francisco. Temp in the 80s, clear blue skies, giant boats flying across the water. Good times.

When we last met, I was waxing rhapsodic over the America’s Cup Sailing races finally coming to San Francisco, one of the most perfect natural venues for a sailboat race. Alas, Larry Ellison, Mr. Oracle, as defender of the Cup got to chose the new boat design and went with a radical new approach: giant catamarans with towering fixed wings that can go really really fast – 50 mph fast – but are wickedly unstable in the SF Bay conditions.

ACRace 3Two destroyed boats and one crew member’s death later, the official America’s Cup finals kicked off today, after a summer Challenger series where the only suspense was which boat was gonna break down first. Truthfully. I really wanted to blow off this trip, but you know how stern the EW taskmaster can be. So here I am, in glorious weather surrounded by tourists from around the World and SF citizens from all about and happy happy shopkeepers loving the influx of customers. The races are free to all, just head to the waterfront and pick a spot. Grandstands free for the public are near the Marina Green.

ACRace 4A relative treated me to a reception last night at the St Francis Yacht Club where the Italian engineers responsible for figuring out Computational Flow Dynamics made a lot of sense for why this new Wing technology will have other applications and is a great advancement, but they had an open bar and well, I’ll have to get back to you on that one….

The New Zealand boat looked scary good today, the boat was just flying over the water. The Oracle boat looked off its game from the get go. They lost a crew member over the side per-race, and it went down for, there. They had a rip in their Wing that they patched with Duck Tape (hee…h/t EW)

Races 3 and 4 tomorrow (Sunday).

That is it for this sporting weekend ladies and gents. There are a plethora of games and things to talk about, and let’s get to it in comments. Music this week by, of course, a Michigan man, Bob Seger and his Silver Bullet Band, with the classics Travellin Man and Beautiful Loser. Wonderful tunes if you have not heard them in a while.

119 replies
  1. emptywheel says:

    No love for the NFC South, w/Sean Payton’s big return at home against the Division winners? Oughta be a good test of the new D.

    My in-laws, btw, assumed the Domers must be favored because they played in Ireland once.

    Luck of the and all.

  2. bmaz says:

    @emptywheel: That is what this here comment section is for, tell us about the NFC South!

    Say, anybody seen Mr. White? Seems to be a good game going on down at The U.

  3. BearCountry says:

    OK, bmaz, how were you able to do all of that sports talk and miss the US Open in Flushing Meadow? Today is men’s semi-final day. In the first match now Wawvrinka and Djokovic will go to a fifth set to decide the winner. The women’s final will be played. Then the second men’s final of Nadal and Gasquet. Women’s final tomorrow and men on Monday.

  4. emptywheel says:

    @bmaz: Somehow my comment blaming you for all the whingeing Armando and Jim are doing on twitter got eaten by the spam filter. I’ll have to hide Jim’s keys again.

  5. GulfCoastPirate says:

    Did you forget there are two games on Monday night? The Texans get no respect around here.

    Can I start talking about juanito futbol yet or do I have to wait until tonight?

  6. GulfCoastPirate says:

    Anyone want to buy some juanito futbol autographs? I promise not to give any of the proceeds to juanito if the NCAA comes around.

  7. bmaz says:

    @GulfCoastPirate: I’m ready for some Johnny Football!!!

    How rough would it be in Pirate land there if Mr. Juanita Futbol were to beat Bama again this year (Tide is gonna have to roll into College Station you know)?

  8. emptywheel says:

    Quick, bmaz, if you update the post, Rosalind will think you remembered the America’s Cup.

    Where they’re fixing Larry Ellison’s gazillion dollar boat (according to Phillip Anderson) with duck tape.

  9. GulfCoastPirate says:

    @bmaz: I’d have to sell all my pirate ships to pay off the losing bets. :)

    I tell you what though – if Bama wins and the Whorns don’t have a gangbuster year the Whorn alumni are going to sit down in front of Saban and let him fill in the check for any amount he wants.

  10. bmaz says:

    I guess I’ll come back and hide here for a bit; I seem to have displeased a few folks on Twitter by saying that if Obama initiates war with Syria, after having been refused power to do so by Congress, he should be impeached. I am really not so sure what is controversial about that. If the Impeachment Clause and Separation of Powers mean anything at all, if they exist at all, then that would be exactly what they were designed for.

  11. Peterr says:

    @bmaz: “Looking bleak for South Carolina” is my basic starting point for that state, given that these folks send Lindsey to the US Senate.

  12. Jim White says:

    @emptywheel: I tell ya I get no respect today. Gators give away a game they dominated. And then after finishing the day at the horse show, the restaurant door whacked me upside the head as we left after dinner. And my laptop is locked up at the show grounds, so I have to peck out my whining on my phone. And I did not have spamual relations with that comment.

  13. scribe says:

    @bmaz: RE impeachment, I’ve been there for some months now. Between the wiretapping and the lying and the non-prosecution of torture and banksters, there’s been far more than enough to justify throwing him out.

  14. jo6pac says:

    Gooooooooooooo 9ers
    Gooooooooooooo AF
    sad not sure I’ll have time to watch either.

    I disagree on Massa because going into next yr with all the changes in F-1 the F cars well need feed back.

  15. Peterr says:

    @Jim White: Dogs?


    I would have thought that any self respecting Florida fan would have their lawn protected by . . . Oh, I don’t know . . . GATORS!?!

  16. cbl says:

    ‘zup wheelers !

    don’t really have any trash – just cranky ’cause some ol gearhead insisted on watching last race before the Chase (whatevs) and is now sound asleep on the sofa – think I’ll paint an ND logo on his face

    @emptywheel – just now saw the news on Nuclympics – unbelievable, even for the calcified fucks at the IOC

    FTR – I loves Juanito Futbol (and I am not usually a bandwagon gal) but we’ve been watching him since his junior year of hs. – yes, a totally insulated, spoiled dick, but possibly the real deal as well. actually reminds me of Montana in his instincts and ability to see the field.

    and I CAN NOT WAIT for next Saturday’s game !!

    now where’s my box of sharpies . . .

  17. P J Evans says:

    That’s about how I feel, too. That and the NSA stuff – which he’s good with – and the punishing of whistleblowers and the general going along with the Republicans and the tird-wayers and the hippy-punching of people who are left of the center in the Democratic party – and he’s supposed to be familiar with the Constitution and the law.

  18. Rosalind says:

    @bmaz: hey, do you know how hard it is to find a phone booth to dictate my story back to the home office? You have mail…and pics.

  19. bmaz says:


    There is a most awesome long form report now in the main post above – with pictures! – from our Fearless Roving Reporter Rosalind at the America’s Cup Races!

    Go check it out!

  20. emptywheel says:

    Me: UM may win or lose this fecking Domer game.

    But I’m so relieved to be rooting for a team w/a decent D again.

  21. Peterr says:

    “Greetings Wheelies! it is I Rosalind, Roving Reporter. The Emptywheel assignment editor forced me to spend the weekend in San Francisco. Temp in the 80s, clear blue skies, giant boats flying across the water. Good times,

    *throwing yellow flag*

    Temps in the 80s in SF? That isn’t supposed to happen until October. Must be global warming.

  22. P J Evans says:

    They think it will cool off about Monday. Here in the other half of the state, we’d appreciate it cooling off also. (75-80 is what it’s been running at night, here, TYVM.)

  23. masaccio says:

    OK, caught up. Devin Gardner is fabulous, the kind of QB that gives ND fits. Quick, strong and short accurate. ND D is strong on other runners.

  24. masaccio says:

    @bmaz: mistake by Gardner, his first, but worse mistake by Hoke. Why challenge? Cost blue the missed extra point from ND’s always exciting kicking game.

  25. Bay State Librul says:

    Yeah. Good idea. Impeachment will end up in a global trash talk blood letting exercise.
    Best to think happy sports thoughts?

  26. bmaz says:

    @Bay State Librul: If Obama commits yet another egregious violation of Separation of Powers, good, let there be global blood letting on the man. That is how the system works, and that is what he would deserve.

  27. Bay State Librul says:

    Put away your sword and root for Brady, at least for today?
    I remember working one summer at Ted Hood’s Sail Loft in Marblehead as a janitor. Hood was at the helm in the America’s Cup, yachting the Nefertiti in the 60’s. Hood died this summer. He was in his high 80’s, I think.
    Sailing, not war, brother.
    Rosalind has some fine pics

  28. JohnT says:

    Couple predictions off the top of my head

    Adrian Peterson runs for 151+ (he’ll get at least 165) yards in win over teh Kitties. To be one of only three RB’s with 9,000+ yards in 90 games, Jim Brown and Eric Dickerson being the other two

    Zach Sudfeld (who???) gets at least 6 receptions, and at least one TD for the Patriots

    Andrew Luck throws for 300+ in blowout over the Raidahs

    Chiefs get first win in a nine or ten win season

    PS Cleaning teh Jerrahtron in Jerrah’s World (Cowboy’s Stadium)

  29. scribe says:

    So, it looks like the Patsies have inherited Mendenhall’s fumblematic problem.

    And that gnashing of teeth you hear and crunching sound is Sanchez watching Geno Smith get a TD in his first half of NFL play, followed by the shattered remains of Sanchez’ career imploding.

    F’g Pouncey can’t help but get hurt. Again.

  30. Valley Girl says:


    Hey! Just noticed your Falcons Saints comment from yesterday.

    Last year you were great at finding me some obscure place on the net (finland?) to watch a Falcons game live. Lost the bookmark. Any ideas?

    Cough… Falcons ahead.

  31. tjallen says:

    During the F-1 broadcast, an announcer said Bruce McLaren would be proud… no way! This is the most embarrassing McLaren in many years, slow as a slug.

    I suspect Massa and Hulkenburg will switch teams, but Hulky seems such a shy, nice guy that I don’t know if he’ll hold up under Ferrarimania.

    After qualifying, Hamilton said, “I drove like an idiot,” something others have been saying for years!

    My poor Williams team, running with the Caterhams. :-(

  32. bmaz says:

    @tjallen: Hamilton is a piece of work, and not in a good way. Yeah, I heard the comment about McLaren and did not agree with it either. He and Teddy Mayer incorporated McLaren so as to have money to keep it self contained and existent as an Australian team. Though the name still exists today, it is anything but self contained and it has been a UK team ever since the merger/buyout by Ron Dennis. So, no, don’t think Bruce would be happy.

    I also am having problems with all the shilling for the movie “Rush”, which apparently paints Niki Lauda and James Hunt as enemies. They were not; they were rivals, but b=very much not enemies at all. May make for a good movie, but it is not true.

  33. scribe says:

    Brutal injury report out of Pgh. Pouncey (C) – ACL/MCL – probably done for the year. Foote (LB) torn bicep, probably done for the year, maybe his career. Cortez Allen (CB) – ankle. 2nd RB – knee.

    But, hey, we’re still tied for first in the division. Everyone’s 0-1.

  34. Peterr says:

    Meanwhile, out on the SF Bay, the Kiwis spanked the Oracles *hard* in the first race of the day, to take a 3-0 lead in the America’s Cup series.

  35. scribe says:

    @emptywheel: Well, it helps when the Boy Named Suh doesn’t lose it and stomp someone.

    Unlike, say, that guy from Tampa Bay who “hit” Geno Smith “late” and drove a spike into Sanchez’ career. Like it needed another one. Can’t wait to see the covers of the tabloids. It’ll be like the Second Coming with rainbows and extra sparkles.

  36. emptywheel says:


    bmaz has officially finally said something about his Cardinals.

    Been telling him the Honey Badger changes everything.

  37. bmaz says:

    @emptywheel: Not a good day for my main team, The Cheese, or my tertiary team, the Cards (my secondary team, the Broncos, rocked). That said, there were good things as to both the Pack and Cards, even in close hard fought losses. If those games are played in Lambeau and Phoenix today, they are probably wins. Disappointing, but some grit and ability out of both actually.

  38. Peterr says:

    @GulfCoastPirate: I think “in the intro” may be extraneous. Given a choice between the Jerry Joneses, the Giants, and Faith Hill — as an intro, the main course, or as the dessert — it’s not a stretch to decide on Faith Hill.

  39. CTuttle says:

    What’s up with BieberBrady…? That was a close call in Buffalo…! The Squawks D looked good in Carolina…! And a ton of players should’ve been ejected in the 9ers/Cheesehead fiasco, and the first should’ve been Clay Matthews…! I hope the league looks at the tape and levies some serious fines…!

    Btw, my Beantown Beanies notched another BS in Super Mario’s career, albeit they lost it on a WP…! *gah*

  40. tjallen says:

    @bmaz: The movie Rush should at least have a good contrast – one of the best looking men in the world as James Hunt, vs burnt up, blister-faced Niki Lauda.

  41. bmaz says:

    @evolute: Boldin was here with the Cards for years. Incredibly strong personality, a true leader and tough as nails and very disciplined on the field. He is a huge pickup for the Niners.

  42. GulfCoastPirate says:

    @bmaz: For a sixth round draft choice. Unbelievable. He’s a darn good receiver and I’ve got a feeling Harbaugh is going to find ways to get him the ball.

  43. bmaz says:

    Tap, tap, tap – anybody in here??

    Who ya got, Eagles or Skins?

    Personally, I am thinking this Eagles offense is pretty darn exciting.

  44. bmaz says:

    @JohnT: means “retweet” – i.e. when you are repeating a previous tweet. You may also see “MT”, which stands for “modified tweet” which is a repeat of a previous tweet, but that has been modified slightly from the original, but still should carry same root meaning.

  45. Bay State Librul says:


    Speaking of twitter, they added some mo-jo to their lineup

    Twitter has acquired MoPub, a mobile ad network, ad serving business, and real time bidding exchange that claims to handle around $100 million annual spending on apps and other mobile media, according to Techcrunch. The deal cost Twitter $350 million in stock, according to the report

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