NFL Pro Bowl Trash Talk

Hahahahaha, psyche!

No, there is no substantive Pro Bowl Trash Talk. Because the Pro Bowl is a complete worthless joke.

This is a let loose on idiocy in general post. Which is more than what the NFL Pro Bowl is at this point.

Have fun and let yer hair down.

Music by Jefferson Airplane. Paul Kantner was an incredibly nice, and extremely under appreciated, seminal musician. RIP Mr. Kantner, and thanks.

Bmaz is a rather large saguaro cactus in the Southwestern Sonoran desert. A lover of the Constitution, law, family, sports, food and spirits. As you might imagine, a bit prickly occasionally. Bmaz has attended all three state universities in Arizona, with both undergraduate and graduate degrees from Arizona State University, and with significant post-graduate work (in physics and organic chemistry, go figure) at both the University of Colorado in Boulder and the University of Arizona. Married, with both a lovely child and a giant Sasquatch dog. Bmaz has been a participant on the internet since the early 2000’s, including active participation in the precursor to Emptywheel, The Next Hurrah. Formally joined the Emptywheel blog as an original contributing member at its founding in 2007. Bmaz grew up around politics, education, sports and, most significantly, cars; notably around Formula One racing and Concours de Elegance automobile restoration and showing. Currently lives in the Cactus Patch with his lovely wife and beast of a dog, and practices both criminal and civil trial law.
26 replies
  1. P J Evans says:

    The Superb Owl talk is the rearranging of letters on the temporary – and reportedly un-permitted – statues in SF.

    I’m wondering if there will also be talk of Johnny Football’s latest incident.

  2. Peterr says:

    But bmaz!
    .
    This is the NFL, which has to be The Best. In Everything. Ever.
    .
    MLB can have a screwy tie in their All Star game. The NHL can whittle their game to a 3-on-3 scrimmage, with one of this year’s teams captained by a minor leaguer elected by Teh Internet as it trolled the system. But they both take a back seat to Roger The Fleecer and the Pro Bowl.
    .
    Roger will tell you himself: it’s not a completely worthless joke. It creates millions in revenue for The Shield. God knows why, but it does. We can laugh, but Roger will laugh all the way to the bank.

    • bmaz says:

      As pathetic as the Pro Bowl is, keep in mind that it often gets higher ratings than World Series games. As Yakoff Smirnoff would say, “what a country!”

  3. Peterr says:

    Suggestion for next year’s Pro Bowl. . . .
    .
    After the players are named to the team, require that the defensive players play offense, and the offensive players play defense. Kickers become returners, and the player who weighs the most on each team must do the kicking.

  4. Halle Bally says:

    a fetus with decernable body parts
    a front page artical
    after a few back and fourth texts
    a huge uproar from an angered populous
    a low risk of loosing money
    a member who does not tow the party line
    a never ending Marshall Law situation
    a populous they cannot spy on
    a price the market will bare
    a shoe-in for the nomination
    a show trial and a summery execution
    a war you will loose
    abedding the enemy
    about illiciting an emotional response
    accused of aiding and abating the enemy
    all those who were mislead by Obama
    an epidemic that ravaged the populous
    and their going to do it anyway
    arresting dissonants prevents street protests
    as appose to
    but more often then not
    but you’ve been lead to believe
    by shear coincidence
    carple tunnel syndrome
    complicent with the NSA
    copywright and patten laws
    could be the tip of the iceburg
    data breech; security breeches; breeches of trust
    deep package inspection
    doing something blatenly illegal
    evolution is a trick by satin
    except wolves are less viscous
    financial hurtle in completing the original
    fines should be metered out for such foolishness
    good riddens
    having delusions of grandieur
    he might be able to affect more change
    I agree whole hardily
    I am tried of all these articles, every single day
    I did question the voracity of the individual
    I don’t really object to it in principal
    I don’t think there’s any alterior motives
    I hold no allusions that
    in full force and affect
    in who’s favor
    installing a switch just encase they needed it
    intelligent people to give us wise council
    it has politicians back peddling like crazy
    it’s all just smoke in mirrors
    it’s also tax deductable
    it’s clearly a real phenomena
    it’s somewhere in that continuem
    it’s the job of others to reign them in
    it is targeted at diary farms
    its gotten so bad
    its pretty much guaranteed
    its starting to show it’s age
    its the same thing for
    how it was suppose to work
    human ginny pigs
    lough these many years ago
    low and behold
    maintaining control is of the up most importance
    malice of forethought
    mellicious hackers working for the Russian mob
    money has more power then truth
    more often than naught
    most journalists are loathe to criticize Obama
    no empiracle evidence for global warming
    not a valid criterium for arguing
    not as easy as you might be lead to believe
    nothing to loose sleep over
    one who has been mislead
    pass through your digestive track unhindered
    publically traded
    reap what you sew
    reign in these abusive monopolies
    renigged on the deal
    scientists in the past have been loathe to admit
    searches and ceazures
    should and should not be aloud
    slammed the laundry shoot door
    someone who’s name is on one of their lists
    something to that affect
    risked their wealth on a hair-brained scheme
    that is the crutch of the problem
    thats exactly why
    the bad out ways the good
    the basic tenants she swore to uphold
    the conservative block in the U.S. Congress
    the electorial college which is outdated
    the eminent death of the PC industry
    the end of the world is neigh
    the next cubical
    there is a disgruntaled employee involved
    the TV ariel on his roof
    the upward assent of mankind
    their tired and true methods
    they should be held libel
    they will find a happy median between
    this one seems to of got me as well
    to a lessor extent
    trained to route out terrorists
    unequivocably
    up to the minuet, around the clock
    use your right to bare arms
    vessels made specifically for sea fairing
    vote for either fraction of the ruling class party
    what effects one effects them all
    what they’re eluding to when they say
    When low and behold, who would of thought
    whoa be unto those who
    who’s ox gets gored
    why fight on the loosing side
    without further adieu
    worried by the opinion poles
    you know the ends and outs of constitutional law
    you pretend porn is vial and evil

  5. bloopie2 says:

    Basketball, baseball, and hockey have All Star games. Why not football? Come on, you people are all so smart, tell me how football is different. It’s an honor for the players. Can’t you just ignore it and let it go on? Why is your opinion so much more important than theirs?

    • Peterr says:

      It’s because the players think it’s silly. They have no problem being honored by being named the best at their position, but then they have to go out and play a game that does not matter, and in which they risk potentially career ending injuries. Add to that the fact that players on the two teams in the Super Bowl do not play. Add to that the fact that the folks who walk away with the bulk of the money are not the players but the owners.
      .
      At least in baseball, they use the same rules as during the regular season. The Pro Bowl is flag football without the flags, masquerading as a highly professional, highly competitive game.
      .
      The players know that it’s a crock. I’m simply agreeing with the players.

      • bloopie2 says:

        All (or most of) the players feel that way? Evidence thereof? Also, I am curious to see statistics on the number of career ending injuries that have been suffered in the Pro Bowl. And, “masquerading as a highly professional, highly competitive game”? Doubtful. Who thinks that to be the case? None of the various sports’ all-star games come across that way; everyone knows it’s just a chance to show off some skills and have a bit of fun while you are being honored. And, as to the money not going to the players, so what? Isn’t every regular season game just like that? Should we cancel all of those also?

  6. felonious says:

    Bmaz the musical choice is outstanding bringing to mind falls in Ithaca, New York cruising the collegetown streets in a firebird wailing 3/5 of a mile in its wake. If trash is your game than Kantner and the Airplane were your musical guest (or as my lovely wife said concerning the Airplane, “they’re in your face”). Now excuse me while I rummage out my dusty copy of Bless its Pointed Little Head and continue the reverie.

  7. bmaz says:

    Bless It’s Pointed Little Head is one of the most kick ass albums ever. Still have mine, and the poster insert, though both have a lot of wear and tear over the decades.

  8. bloopie2 says:

    What on earth does Roger Goodell have to do with a game in which (most of) the sport’s best players are honored? Let the guys have a bit of fun; don’t use their big day as yet another excuse to criticize him. And bmaz is right; it’s better to watch game this than to watch one slow, boring, World Series game after a 20,000 game MBL season that lasted forever. That baseball game may mean something, but it’s really shit to watch on TV.

  9. bloopie2 says:

    Here’s idiocy for you. The NFL Network running half hour programs, one after another, of Super Bowl game highlights. From old to new. Fifty in a row, all night long. What idiot wastes his time watching such crap? What idiot decided to pay people a salary to make those shows? And most tellingly, what idiot blithely pays his cable bill every month, unquestioningly, knowing that a small portion of it goes to the NFL Network to subsidize such idiocy? Honestly, that was one of my choices last night, out of the 560 (I counted) different channels I had available. So I went to bed.

  10. scribe says:

    As usual, the NYT plays the understatement game very, very well: “Inquiry Focuses on Manziel” http://www.nytimes.com/2016/01/31/sports/football/inquiry-focuses-on-manziel.html?_r=0

    Y’know, though, it was in Texas right near JerryWorld. So, I could see Jerry hiring Young Mr. Football after the Browns take their losses (first round pick, millions of dollars) and wash their hands. Since he’s doing all this crap in Texas, Jerry could just hire a team of minders to keep him on the straight and narrow, drive him to work, yadda yadda.
    .
    Or not, and let us enjoy the entertainment value of a guy with some talent flying his career straight into the ground.
    .
    Whatever else you say about Tebow (still available! working out! in shape!), he didn’t screw up off the field.

    • bloopie2 says:

      The GOP candidates? What are they doing in Iowa? Trying to get votes, that’s what. It should be perfectly obvious. Great God!
      .
      (thanks to Four Weddings and A Funeral, the “bride or groom” sequence.)
      .
      :)

  11. Bitter Angry Drunk says:

    Actually I believe Goodell threatened to cancel the Pro Bowl a couple of years back due to its pointlessness. It’s the players — the ones that choose to go — who like that week in Hawaii in January. Can’t say that I blame them.

  12. bmaz says:

    To Peterr at # 21, this is a family blog, why would you ask me a question demanding a NSFW answer like that??

Comments are closed.