Super Bowl 2017 Trash Talk

Here we are at the end of another NFL season. And the biggest sports day of the year. As you can see in the title, I have given up on the league’s insistence on Roman numeral designators. We are not in Rome, and they make my head hurt after a while. We are past that while.

The Falcons and the Patriots in Houston. It has, from all appearances, been a fantastic week in Houston, the city has really shined. I am not surprised, Houston has been an under appreciated gem as to municipal government competence and civic activity for quite a while now. And a great town for a wide diversity of excellent food!

A couple of news and notes: Matt Ryan was named the NFL MVP last night, beating out Tom Brady by far more than he should have, but still a fair choice. On a local note, Larry Fitzgerald was made the co-recipient of the Man of the Year Award with Eli Manning. Spidey Fitz is incredible, both here in Phoenix and back in his original home of Minnesota. Well deserved. Also, Kurt Warner was named to the Hall of Fame. Any man that can get both the Cardinals and Rams to the Super Bowl absolutely belongs in the Hall of Fame. Here is a complete list of all the NFL honors announced last night.

As to the game itself, it is quite clear that the politicization from the abject racism and bigotry of Trump, and especially his Muslim ban, are going to spill into the spotlight. Given the publicity platform of an event like the Super Bowl, that is not surprising, but it is stunning as to how much it seems to be so this year. Things are not normal in the US anymore, even if the old “normal” had its warts.

But today’s game is being broadcast by the right wing bastion of Rupert Murdoch’s FOX network. And they are, predictably, censoring the paid advertising content they will show. The video at the top was a 90 second spot that Lumber 84 was desirous of paying full freight for a 90 second ad that bills out at about $5 million per 30 seconds. Would FOX take that money from Lumber 84 for one of the most beautifully produced ads you will ever see? Nope, too “controversial” for the assholes at Fox. Guess they figured their nutjob boy Trump might be watching. Selective censorship.

Interestingly, FOX apparently will air a similarly themed ad from Anheuser Busch, an advertising juggernaut that they cannot risk pissing off. That ad is to the right. Why is it less objectionable than the Lumber 84 spot? Basically because Busch has real ad buying power and Lumber 84 does not. The AB ad is great too, but the complete craven hypocrisy of FOX is on full display here. Can’t have too much advertising space that might upset Dear Leader Donald! I mean, shit, he might lash out in an incoherent tweet!

Alright, to the game. As always, the actual football has been micro-analyzed endlessly for the last two weeks, so I do not have a ton of analysis to add. The focus seems to have been more slanted to the two teams’ offensive capabilities. I will say, I think that is wrong. Both offenses are relatively healthy and potent (except Falcons’ star center Alex Mack will play with a small fracture in his fibula). A decent team matchup rundown from the AP is here.

Instead, I think, as it turns out is usually the case, defense will decide the winner. The Pats have a deceptively decent defense, and, as also is usually the case, they have really gelled down the stretch. The game’s outcome will be decided by how well New England’s defense plays. I have no idea who will win, but I hope it is the Patriots so that the odious Roger Goodell has to hand the trophy to Bob Kraft and Tom Bady.

That is it folks. Eat some food, drink some beer and spirits, and have a ball.

61 replies
  1. emptywheel says:

    Also, for those who’re asking, I’m assuaging my guilt about rooting for the Pats by donating $25 for each Pats TD and $10 for each Pats FG to CAIR as part of the #AGoodGame push.

    Go Brady!

  2. Jim White says:

    Fuck the cheating cheater Pats and their Trump fandom. They are perfect matches.

    I’m Dirty Birds all the way today. Don’t overlook their defense, either. Recall that Dan Quinn was DC for the thoroughly detestable Muschamp and it was Quinn’s defense that kept the Gators from being an even bigger embarrassment than they were.

  3. pdaly says:

    Has the NFL certified the indoor locker room temperature and the outdoor stadium temperature for today’s game yet?!  ;-)

  4. Eric X says:

    84 Lumber is a brown woman and a brown girl child, AB is a white man drinking beer.  Other than that, almost the same.

    • B says:

      and one is over a hundred years ago9When immigration laws were different),  the other is modern day, but do not let things like truth and reality come up, it interrupts the meme of “unfettered immigration for all” and “discrimination” and such…

      I’d like to see the end, and will look at it after halftime before commenting further.


  5. pdaly says:

    I don’t like the Roman numerals either.

    However,  LI written as “Li” immediately makes me think of the abbreviation for lithium, a mood stabilizer for bipolar disorder and maybe a treatment for impulse control in people with narcissistic personality disorder.

  6. John Casper says:

    Excellent 1st quarter.  bmaz, great call on the AB commercial.

    Joe Buck was late on identifying the Atlanta player on both Falcon sacks, like he didn’t know their numbers and was waiting to read it off the back of their jersey.

  7. John Casper says:



    “Why should Pennsylvania … become a Colony of aliens, who will shortly be so numerous as to Germanize us, instead of our Anglifying them, and will never adopt our language or customs, any more than they can acquire our complexion?”
    — Benjamin Franklin, Observations Concerning the Increase of Mankind, Peopling of Countries, etc., 1751

  8. Peterr says:

    We just got the Lumber 84 commercial here in KC. Local spot, rather than (rejected) national spot?

    Either way, wow.

  9. Avattoir says:

    Fitz bi-winning the NFLMotY brings to mind my Greatest Ever online SB kibbitz: February 1, 2009, when I insta-pre-called both Spidey’s TDs. Won the blog’s SBMVTT award: a plumber’s helper spray-spackled in fool’s gold … or would have, if there’d been one … probably.

    • bmaz says:

      The pick 6 on Brady near end of first half reminded me of what Pittsburgh, via Harrison, did to the Cardinals in that game. Ugh. Bad memories!

      • Avattoir says:

        As bad a feeling as Vikings’ fans forced to watch the best ever Minnesota-born footballer toil in your desert the last 13 years?

        To paraphrase Burl Ives:

        And when there is a little pain/ it’s not a constant pain: / It kinda just comes and goes.

        It ‘comes and goes’, alright: / It arrives in the fall and it’s just not right.

  10. Avattoir says:

    Deflating for Atlanta. If Patsies pull this out, someone’s likely going to have to hand over the SBMVP trophy to Brady.

    • Peterr says:

      I think that “someone” will be King Roger, which should be fun in a sad kind of way.

      Reporter to Brady: “So, what gave you the energy for this game?”

      Brady to reporter: “I think it was the four game rest I got at the beginning of the season. Thanks, Roger — couldn’t have done this without you.”

  11. Jonf says:

    OH nuts! The birds couldn’t hang on. But you gotta give it to Brady. What a comeback. I hated to watch it. Oh well.

  12. scribe says:

    Just for the record: some time ago along the way I’d picked up one of those pocket-sized packages of facial tissues (the kind you cry into) which King Roger the Clown’s Greed Patrol had emblazoned with the Patriots’ logo. I’d had them rattling around my desk for some time. At one minute before 9 ET, I sent EW an email in the background promising to send them to her b/c she’d be needing them.
    About 10 seconds after I hit “send”, the momentum of the game turned in favor of the Pats. Irretrievably, as it turned out. So, blame me.
    And, now, Fox is telling me Kraft The Elder and Biebs will be receiving the Lombardi from King Roger the Clown.
    Which makes this Steeler fan smile, almost as much as if it were Silverback Harrison.
    Here’s hoping someone on the podium makes a crack about feeling deflated.

      • scribe says:

        Love the way the crowd treated King Roger the Clown, how they turned around instantly when Kraft the Elder got the mike, and how King Roger ran down the stairs from the podium and disappeared.  Craven prig.

  13. burnt says:

    Okay, emptywheel, I’m going to have to match your donations to your charity of choice. That was unbelievable. Bittersweet and I are completely dumbstruck.

  14. John Forde says:

    Tom Brady has 5 Super Bowl rings In the same sense that Barry Bonds has 762 Home runs. The taint will never go away.

  15. Jim White says:

    Wow. Even sleeping on it doesn’t diminish the level profound disappointment that the evil cheating cheater bastards won again. They’ve sold their souls so many times already, I would have thought that selling again to Trump would have left them without enough to fulfill the evil bargain. Boy was I wrong. At some point, karma will catch up to these creeps. I just hope I live long enough to see it.

    Congrats, ew and bmaz, the dark side has won completely.

    At least I leave for New Zealand on Wednesday and can leave all of this behind for nearly two weeks. And then I come back to Gator baseball…

    • Bay State Librul says:

      Have a good trip to NZ

      We are at Logan awaiting a flight to Cancun

      The Jet Blue terminal is crawling with crazy fans

      Too bad you will miss the Duck Boat Parade on Tuesday Snow is predicted. The circus catch by Edelman was the turning point



  16. lefty665 says:

    I’m not a Pats fan, but it was wonderful to see Goodell have to present the trophy to Kraft. He was booed loudly enough that I couldn’t hear whatever mealy mouthed things he said while presenting it before he scampered off the stage.

    Did the ball on the trophy look a little under inflated?

    • lefty665 says:

      Thank you so much:)

      Hillary is serving the country far better in the role the voters chose for her than had her asperational ambitions prevailed. That’s as nice as it gets, does that qualify?

      OTOH, I never wanted to be a Pats fan, but Goodell sucked so bad on deflategate that it has been easy to root for his comeuppance. How bad did Goodell suck you ask? So bad that even Trump thinks he sucked. Comes under the heading of “Even a blond hog finds an acorn every now and then.”

      Speaking of Hogs, Joe Jacoby got passed over for the Hall of Fame, again. He deserves a spot, especially since his lesser hogmate Russ Grim has been inducted.


  17. bmaz says:

    In honor of Jim White’s kind (well, kind of anyway) above, I would like to present the most awesome Brady revenge commercial ever:

    <iframe src=”″ width=”640″ height=”360″ frameborder=”0″ webkitallowfullscreen mozallowfullscreen allowfullscreen></iframe>

    <p><a href=”″>Tom Brady for Shields MRI. 5 Rings #Rogerthat</a> from <a href=”″>Shields Health Care</a> on <a href=””>Vimeo</a>.</p>


  18. Kathleen says:

    Generally I do not watch…think I have aversions based on growing up with WWII Teamster father and his friends jumping up and down and betting on games far more than they could afford that turned me into a non participant.

    Although watched this year with my 88 year old card carrying union, die hard Dem mother.  Watched all of the preview information to get up to snuff.  My always committed to the underdog mother (had a stroke 2 years ago so sentences incomplete but you get the picture when she is talking and swinging her arms around) was quickly rooting for the Atlanta Falcons.  She kept saying “Brady does not need to be on top anymore”…”give someone else a chance”  It went on and on.  I was out of my mind with laughter.  She stayed up until the game was over and she was so pissed that the Falcons lost in the last few seconds.

    As she walked to her bedroom on her walker while I walked right behind her (she broke a hip in a nursing home (lots of breaks in nursing homes) she kept repeating “I will never watch football again, I will never watch football again.  Brady did not need to win again.  It was someone else’s turn.”  I laughed even more.  It was  if she watches all of the time.


    Although she was an incredible athlete as a young person.  Fun to watch with an 88 year old

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