Fast Trash

Um, okay, couple of MAJOR problems here. First is the issue of the illegitimate Trash appearing on this blog. and the musical selection for the same? Holy crap, I just do not know how I can work under such conditions. So, it turns out that Detroit had Nickleback, while The Cheese that is Green Bay had an actual quarterback. Like a Honey Badger, Aaron RoDgers don’t care, he just carve you up like Thanksgiving turkey.

Today there are already great games on. I was just talking to Marcy and, during the phone call, there were claims of both good and bad touchdowns in the Big Blue/Ohio game. Yeah, the Buckfucks do not even rate being referred to as Ohio State any more. Michigan gonna do the Hokey Pokey on dem Buckeyes.

Soon the JoePas will be taking on Russell Wilson and the somewhat inconsistent Badgers. There is a side of me that would not mind the young kids who are the Penn State team winning this game and shoving it in the face of a lot of hyperventilated crap. But the football side of me thinks Wilson and the Badgers are a lot better team. I will go with that.

Also, this weekend is the final ring in The Circus. Yes, it is the Brazilian Grand Prix. Sebastian Vettel has now broken the impossible record, and claimed his 15th pole for the season. the previous record was taken by a ground effects car that simply had an unfair advantage on the other teams in the field; Vettel’s record is straight up. It is something special, along the lines of a Triple Crown winner, except for being the top one ever. Truly special. Hats off to young Vettel. Yes, his equipment has been superior, but still so was that of his teammate, Mark Webber, and Vettel has wiped the floor not only with competitors, but Webber as well. I will not say “unparalleled” in the history of motorsport, but is there are parallels, there are damn few of them. It is really something special. There was Fangio, Clark (even if cut short), Senna and then Schumacher. For Vettel to come on the heels so quickly after an all time legend like Schumi is unreal. Again, hats off.

I am apoplectic on a couple of stories, and one of them involves newly appointed Penn State “investigator” Louis Freeh. As to the other, has anybody else noticed the similarity between Dominique Strauss-Kahn and Emilio Largo (also “Eric the Red” for It Takes a Thief fans)? I am, disappointingly, but predictably, off in the tall grass trying to figure out what in the world is going on in both. So this is a placeholder for all the Lugnuts that are the Wheelhouse to lay down some shameful Trash in the meantime. Do not disappoint people!

Trash it up, and further analysis will likely follow later! Also, to cleanse the palate of that fucking Nickleback crap, please enjoy some early Bob Seger System.

Bmaz is a rather large saguaro cactus in the Southwestern Sonoran desert. A lover of the Constitution, law, family, sports, food and spirits. As you might imagine, a bit prickly occasionally. Bmaz has attended all three state universities in Arizona, with both undergraduate and graduate degrees from Arizona State University, and with significant post-graduate work (in physics and organic chemistry, go figure) at both the University of Colorado in Boulder and the University of Arizona. Married, with both a lovely child and a giant Sasquatch dog. Bmaz has been a participant on the internet since the early 2000’s, including active participation in the precursor to Emptywheel, The Next Hurrah. Formally joined the Emptywheel blog as an original contributing member at its founding in 2007. Bmaz grew up around politics, education, sports and, most significantly, cars; notably around Formula One racing and Concours de Elegance automobile restoration and showing. Currently lives in the Cactus Patch with his lovely wife and beast of a dog, and practices both criminal and civil trial law.
88 replies
  1. P J Evans says:

    The musical selection was lost on me: all I got when I clicked on it was that it wasn’t public. (I liked the landscape. (The speakers are turned off, almost always, so I don’t have to listen.)

  2. dakine01 says:

    Even though the Kentucky Wildcats will end the season at 5 – 7, it is a successful season since one of those 5 wins is today’s slapdown of Tennessee. For the first time since 1984, the Mildcats have beaten the Volunteers. Plus, it keeps Tennessee from being bowl eligible.

    And the WKU Hilltoppers are up against Troy 34 – 18 in the 4th quarter. If they can hold on, they will finish 7 – 5 (7 – 1 in conference) and may yet get a bowl bid

  3. emptywheel says:

    Oh, and as to your whinging that our great plan to neutralize Aaron Rogers instead seems to have short circuited Suh’s brain?

    You’ll be happy to know the new next door neighbors we got installed their brand spanking new Packers doormat in practically their first act in the new place.

  4. GulfCoastPirate says:

    We’re still hearing it’s Michigan – UH in the Sugar Bowl if we win next week. How is that if Mich St – Wisconsin are in the championship game. Why isn’t that loser going to come to New Orleans? How is UM getting in?

    Rooms in the French Quarter – Yikes!!!!!!!!!!!

  5. JohnLopresti says:

    It was Thanksgiving wierdness that pitted a team only 100 hours after it won at home, to go to the Charlottesville area and play yet another game without rest.

    Pass the gravy and another drumstick top.

    I was looking for the early trash nickel offense to show up instead of the west coast offense.

    Poor guys on the offensive line. Pass the scrimage.

    Shake the hand that shook the hand that shook the gyroscope that keeps the trains on time.

    complain, ask is there any way outta here

    [Copyright]“No reason to get excited,” the thief, he kindly spoke
    “There are many here among us who feel that life is but a joke
    But you and I, we’ve been through that, and this is not our fate
    So let us not talk falsely now, the hour is getting late”

    All along the watchtower, princes kept the view
    While all the women came and went, barefoot servants, too

    Outside in the distance a wildcat did growl
    Two riders were approaching, the wind began to howl. [End Copyright]

  6. jo6pac says:

    Yep, 9ers meet their match and today Jim H. admitted he didn’t make any adjustments at the half. Gee Jim that why you’re the coach.

    Seb rolls on, he really is amazing. When Sir Stirling said lately he’s the best he has ever seen, well Moss doesn’t hand out a kind word very often. I hope the weather isn’t rain.

    bmaz I left this a few days ago but not sure if you came back.

    Hell now the Al D died I might watch the Raiders

  7. CTuttle says:

    @emptywheel: …we got installed their brand spanking new Packers doormat in practically their first act in the new place. *heh* Gotta mark your territory early, eh…? ;-)

    Congrats on Big Blue’s victory over the Buckfucks…! It’s about damn time…! *gah*

  8. Jim White says:

    Muschump and Tub O’Weiss need to pull the plug on Brantley and put Brissett in. Brantley is done. He actually threw into quadruple coverage…

    Edit: And there’s interception number 3…

  9. emptywheel says:

    @GulfCoastPirate: If Wisconsin loses that game, wouldn’t they have a worse record (one more loss) than UM? And technically, MSU would have a better division record, though worse win-loss record, right?

    More importantly for the Sugar Bowl, UM has more alumni than any other school (or at least used to–I think it’s a factor of having so many grad programs). Probably a lot more national than MSU too. So more of a draw for TV and the game itself.

  10. emptywheel says:

    @CTuttle: I’ll say.

    There was already some Bears and Kitties paraphenalia down the hall, so I’m sure they felt obliged. Pity for them, though, they’re basically at the end of the hallway and so only us and 2 more flats get to see it.

  11. bmaz says:

    @jo6pac: Oooh, did you not see my response? Not positive this link will work, but will try. @bmaz

    Anyway, could not make it to Peterson, but here it was fabulous.

  12. bmaz says:

    Hmmm, RGIII seems to be putting a licking on the Red Rayduhs. Ooops, the Cocks seem to be whuppin the Clemson Tigers.

  13. GulfCoastPirate says:

    @emptywheel: Kind of what I figured.

    Makes no difference. The Big 10 + 1 + 1 + however many can send anyone they want. The end result will be the same. I watched some of those games today and I thought I was watching lumberjacks. Why do they play football in snowshoes? Or, is everyone up that way just that slow?

  14. par4 says:

    re Nickelback, it could have been Justin Beiber. On second thought the corporate media is probably saving him for the Superbowl.

  15. quebecois says:

    A friend of mine in Brazil has just tweeted that the rain has started falling ten minutes ago. A bit more than an hour to go before the last sane weekend before next march…

  16. phred says:

    Happy (belated) Thanksgiving Everyone!

    Nice try on the pre-emptive trash EW ; ) I’ll admit, I was worried, but the 3rd quarter calmed my nerves a bit. PACKERS 11-0!!! Woot : )

    As for Nickelback, whatever. I have always thought pseudo-rock concerts with fake fans on the field in the middle of a football game were never a good idea. Whether it’s the geriatic Stones, a Jackson boob, or random Canadians, it’s weird and inappropriate. Give me the Madison Scouts or the Santa Clara Vanguard and then we can talk… At least with marching bands and drum corps the entire stadium can enjoy the show, not just a few cameras and a small portion of the folks in the seats.

    Still, it’s the halves I care about, not so much the halftime. Speaking of halves, they tend to make wholes, and have I mentioned the Pack is 11-0? ; ) Go Packers!

    And EW, please give my very best regards to your new neighbors with the handsome doormat : )

  17. quebecois says:

    Into the 25th lap, by now, I’m begging for rain. I do love this track, terrain change makes for a good broadcast. Vettel is being told to take it easy on his gearbox. Alonso is having another good day, that’s always good. Sandwich time…

  18. Bob Schacht says:

    Did anyone watch USC vs UCLA? Wow, did the Uclans look pathetic, or what. But USC is under some kind of No Bowl penalty, isn’t it?

    And the Wolvereenies vs Buckeyes was actually a good game, for once. Did I see an early stat in the game that claimed to show that the Buckeyes had the worst passing game of any major college, a category including Army and Navy? No wonder they threw for a touchdown on their first drive. The Wolverine safeties must have been taking a nap. And won’t someone else help the Michigan QB with the offense, so he doesn’t have to take a beating on every play?

    Bob in AZ/HI

  19. rosalind says:

    matt leinart, in his first start in looong time, is knocked out in 2nd Qtr with shoulder injury. may be broken collar bone.

    and the jets guy covering the bill’s receiver just deflected the ball up and the bills guy grabbed it and ran it in for the td. (it was way more entertaining than how that sentence reads).

  20. chartt says:

    If I’m not mistaken, the adrian newey penned williams chassis that nigel mansell drove to the previous pole record was not from the ground effects of the design but rather the active suspension. the in-car cameras at the time showed how much less work the driver had to do to make the car go quickly, rather reminiscent of the in-car video of sebatsian vettel driving the red bull machine this year.

  21. emptywheel says:

    @phred: I think even you would find fault with it. Packers gear is supposed to be well worn, not least to prove you’re not some Johnny Come Lately to the Super Bowl champs. This thing lights up the whole hallway like we had a radiation leak.

  22. 4jkb4ia says:

    The Peterson punt return TD for this game was impressive. I just saw it. My husband and I had a very good time at “Star Trek: The Exhibition”, which is recommended for phred if it comes to her neck of the woods.

  23. phred says:

    @emptywheel: I’m sure they went out and got a shiny new one to christen the new abode. I bet if you asked nicely, they would show you the tattered one in their closet that they just can’t bear to part with ; )

    Now, that you mention it though, I need me some “radiation leak green and gold” in my wardrobe. I’ll have to see what I can do about that…

    And 4jkb4ia, thanks for the tip on Star Trek: The Exhibition. I’ll keep an eye out for it…

  24. scribe says:

    Ray-duhs leading Da Bears, and Tebow in striking position, only down by 6.

    Boo-birds in full cry in Philthy…..

  25. prostratedragon says:

    @Bob Schacht: Missed the telecast yesterday being on the move, but I assume buckeyes stacked up against the run on the early downs to force the game back onto Robinson, who actually has had more help in some key games this year than in any previous year, Fitz Toussaint in particular looking like a keeper.

    But Robinson is really going to have to shoot a couple of teams to ribbons through the air (as if 3td passes weren’t enough) for the opposition to loosen up that box a bit.

  26. scribe says:

    Like the old-school AFL bright blue end zone paint on the Bolts-Broncs.

    Elway looks like he’s seriously constipated, thinking Tebow might come in to win.

    UPDATE: SD FG attempt wide right. Elway looks for some stool softener, Paulie Walnuts hair and all.

  27. burnt says:

    Delurking to type, “Sweet Baby Jesu.” Let me re-phrase that, “Sweet Baby Tebow.” Has anyone ever put up the numbers Tebow has and gone 5 and 1? Twelve years of Catholic school along with a philosophy B.A. made me a non-believer. This Tebow kid may bring me back to the Church.

    However, my liberal arts education made me a suspicious SOB (sorry, ma, for that sexist terminology). I’m thinking there must be some sort of twist here, a Faustian twist if you will. I wonder if it’s really God who is on Tebow’s side. Just typin’. Just typin’.

  28. GulfCoastPirate says:

    @bmaz: LOL – ASU has as much chance of hiring away Sumlin as I have of becoming president. I’m sure every coaching vacancy that comes up is going to have his name on it; however, if Stoop’s brother couldn’t make a go of it at UA then you won’t see Sumlin heading to the desert for a variety of reasons. You’ve got my email address if you want to know more.

    As a Catholic I’m starting to wonder what is going on. I watched ND look awful last night and now Tebow pulls out another win. Could Jesus really be a right wing fundamentalist?

  29. GulfCoastPirate says:

    @emptywheel: Hey, Randiego needs to call his boys in Lubbock and get them to get The Pirate back. Time for commiserating is over if Baylor is kicking your ass.

  30. GulfCoastPirate says:

    Word is Texans said NO FARVE. Too disruptive. Thanks god – I don’t think I could take that prima donna.

  31. rosalind says:

    unofficial trash talk roving reporter here with an update. h/t to jo6pac, i made it over to the Petersen Automotive Museum this afternoon to catch the last day of their Phil Hill exhibit. our man bmaz having penned many a touching posts on his mentor and friend, i will limit my report to the following:

    * Phil Hill had one of the coolest Aunt’s on earth. She had exquisite taste in cars and the money to back it up. The first car on exhibit is her ginormous 1918 Packard Twin Six with its cool mottled finish that someone who knows cars will need to explain…i’ve never seen anything like it.

    * Next up, Auntie’s 1931 Pierce-Arrow that Phil learned to drive on and then used to commute to USC. bmaz is right, photos cannot do justice to the amazing blue color.

    * A photo above shows little Phil with his first car, a Model T his Aunt helped him find and purchase, which he then disassembled and reassembled countless times figuring out how everything worked. The “Jesus Saves” sign in the left front corner of the windshield courtesy his Aunt and Mother.

    * Moving into the race cars, my favorite was the white & blue 750 Monza he won the 1955 Pebble Beach Road Race in, mostly for the two little leather straps & silver buckles on the hood cover. Again, car gurus will need to clue me in as to the exact purpose of those little straps.

    * A photo above shows Phil on a track with Enzo Ferrari and others gathered around hanging on his every word. The caption says Enzo liked to get direct feedback from Phil, and the photo really shows Phil commanding their respect.

    * No cell phones or faxes or e-mail, Ferrari communicated with Phil through telegrams. My first fav, addressed to Derek Dunt of Oxford, England reads:

    “If Phil Hill is with you please ask him to take first airplane to Modena STOP Mr. Ferrari wishes to speak with him personally on Friday, July 7th please cable thanks.”

    The second, from Phil to Enzo:

    “Regret series of misunderstandings since letter 22 Oct anxious to drive for you Sebring and 1960 STOP Doubling of salary agreeable please advise immediately if acceptable to you Saluti”

    The exhibit gives a glimpse into a man with boundless curiosity and more passions than can be contained in one corner of a museum. Coming home I found an interview with his wife Alma with this story:

    “Phil was curious about everything. Of course he loved machinery, especially the cars, but that curiosity also went into all his mechanical musical instruments. He got involved in everything, even little parts of daily life. He wanted to know how things worked. I remember baking a cake once and it didn’t taste right so he reread the recipe. Phil didn’t cook, but pointed out that if I would use hot water to melt the chocolate it would work, so I did it and it worked.”

    Thanks again to jo6pac for the heads up on the exhibit. While the Phil Hill exhibit is done, a very fun Scooter exhibit continues through May.

  32. rosalind says:

    ahhhhhhh!!!! uhm, bmaz? is there moderation for certain comments? if not, my roving reporter report on the Phil Hill exhibit at the Petersen i spent the last 1/2 hour writing just got eated.

    (edit: thx, mods!!)

  33. rosalind says:

    @bmaz: thx, bmaz! when i got to the first family photo, i thought “there’s bmaz’ mother’s best bud!!”

    and laughing at the following will probably send me to hell, but c’mon:

    Cal legend Joe Kapp, who both quarterbacked and coached the Golden Bears, got into a physcial altercation Friday night with former CFL rival Angelo Mosca, a defensive tackle with the Hamilton Tigers-Cats back in the day who used to hook horns with Kapp.

    The two were being honored at the CFL Alumni Legends Luncheon in Vancouver when things went wrong. The old-timers, both 73 years old, exchanged cane blows, punches and more in an embarassing exchange.

  34. GulfCoastPirate says:

    @bmaz: Who needs a rollercoaster when you have T J Yates from that famous quarterback factory North Carolina? The papers down here are saying Kubes says no to Farve. Of course, he could change his mind if Mr. Yates gets rolled next week.

  35. euclidcreek says:

    Through a cloud of smoke – Van Winkle and Teegarden on drums & Hammond B-3? Great great album includes Heavy Music! Goin’ deeper….

  36. Bob Schacht says:

    @Jim White: Thanks for mentioning that. Isn’t Baylor the team with the really tall (for women) center who is still only a junior(?)? Who won? [I’m a fan of women’s NCAA Basketball, and V-ball too.]

    Bob in AZ/HI

  37. Bob Schacht says:

    @prostratedragon: Toussaint is indeed a keeper– he gained 120 yards in 20 carries. But Robinson carried the ball 26 times and passed 17 times– meaning that he got knocked down more than all the rest of the offense combined. His average per completed pass was close to 12 yards, so he wasn’t just dumping off short passes.

    Bob in AZ but still in HI until tomorrow

  38. Jim White says:

    @Bob Schacht: Yup. Brittney Griner is 6-8. Tennessee held her in check the first half, but she went off in the second and Baylor won the game, breaking a very long UT home winning streak.

    This is a very interesting season for watching the Tennessee team. Pat Summit announced this summer that she has early onset dementia but is not yet retiring. The assistants are playing a more active role and everyone is very open about it. It’s nice she’s getting at least one more year. Summit is a tremendous coach, the fact that the court in Thompson-Boling now has her name on it, even when the men’s team plays, says how much she has accomplished in her tremendous career. She should have been given a chance to coach a men’s team somewhere; she would have been just as good there.

  39. scribe says:

    Mmmmm … Stillers win.

    But I am not liking these defensive fire drills, having to stop potential game-losing drives in the last seconds. That will haunt them come playoff time – that’s why the Ravens and not the Stillers are winning the AFC North. Better to get a solid, two-score lead and be done with opponents.

  40. Bay State Librul says:


    It’s your QB
    The 1-2-3 ratings are Rodgers (85.6), Brees (77.6) and Tommy at 74.7

    Uncle Ben is 8th with 65.8, a D+ for the playoffs.

  41. GulfCoastPirate says:

    Oh – oh. Helicopter Sage Rosenfels is reportedly taking a physical today down in Miami to come off injured reserve and go through waivers. Need I say more?

  42. rosalind says:

    and UCLA fires Rick Neuheisel, but will let him coach this week’s Pac 10+2 “just give Oregon the freakin’ trophy already” playoff.

    that won’t be awkward.

  43. bmaz says:

    @rosalind: Yeah, Peterson has been mentioned here too. Why the hell would he leave Boise State for either one at this point? We got the original offensive whiz bang hi-tech Boise State coach, Dirk Koetter, about ten years ago. I think Peterson is the real deal, but Koetter floundered here. Bad.

  44. bmaz says:

    @GulfCoastPirate: Nope but two top receivers are leaving, so should be his time if it is going to come. There IS talent at ASU – good QB and they were decimated by injuries this year, all of those will be coming back. The AD here is named Lisa Love, and she is fucking horrible. Nobody likes her and she has made terrible hires. She needs to go. I would love to get Leach, but from best I can tell, they will not even consider him.

  45. GulfCoastPirate says:

    @bmaz: I don’t get the non love for Leach among AD’s. If they don’t like Leach then Sumlin won’t wear very well either. Like Leach, he’s not a schmoozer. Like I said in the email I sent you while personable he’s not going to change his way of doing things no matter what the money boys at ASU or anywhere else say.

    Here’s the other thing about Leach (who is really a disciple of John Jenkins who was at UH in the 90’s). He’s getting a crew of younger coaches placed across the country. Holgerson at WVU. You’ve got Kingsbury at UH (old Leach QB) and Jason Phillips at UH who came from the Jenkins era who will both be head coaches somewhere fairly soon. There’s more in the pipeline. What they’re all doing is taking Leach’s offense and expanding it by speeding it up (which means the QB has to call a lot of the plays) and introducing additional types of routes to get more guys out in what they refer to as ‘space’. If you watch UH what they try to do is find the guy who’s left 1 on 1 and then let him use his speed to make big plays. They also run the ball a lot more than Leach ever thought of doing. If you look at Keenum’s numbers this year he actually has far fewer passing attempts than in the past.

    Of course, to do that you need big lineman who are in shape and can still play effectively and control the line in the 4th quarter. Remember, Sumlin hasn’t even won a conference championship yet. Part of that is he’s bringing the big guys he’s recruited along slowly. They get a redshirt year, play a little as redshirt freshman and by that time they’ve had them in a weight/conditioning program for 2 years and they’re more ready to go. You can’t have big fat guys in the line if you want to run 90 offensive plays a game and most high schoolers aren’t ready for that. So any school that may hire him away is looking at a 3 or 4 year time span before he’s going to bring much benefit at all. Most schools don’t want to wait that long which is why many down here don’t think he’s going anywhere. He’s got his pipeline built now and can just keep plugging in as folks graduate. Does he want to go through that again at a mid level BCS AQ school whose backers may want instant results? Who knows – I suppose he may if the money is right but the guessing is as long as we keep his salary competitive he’ll wait for one of the really, really plum jobs to come along.

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