Are You Ready For Some Futbol? Special FIFA Trash

Yeah, well, gather round the campfire boys and girls, because this may be the only time you get soccer trash talk out of me. And it took some extreme measures from mom to get it at all. But Mr. Wheel, being Irish and all, has the beautiful game in him and that is enough for me; so here goes.

Tomorrow’s match with England may be, at least in some respects, the biggest soccer tilt the US has ever played; certainly at least in a very long time. The tilt goes off at 1:30 pm EST and 10:30 PST. From NBC Sports:

The bars are stocked across America, and the pubs are getting ready in England. A 70½-foot billboard of Clint Dempsey stands near Penn Station in Manhattan, and there’s even a large poster of Landon Donovan in a store along Piccadilly Circus.

American soccer has never been more popular in the United States or its players more well-known across the world. And on Saturday comes the first competitive match between the U.S. and England since the great American upset at the 1950 World Cup. For one afternoon, millions will be watching from California to New York island. Like never before in the United States, this is the sport’s moment.

Yep, sounds about right. Brits v. Yanks. Old Glory v. Union Jack. The big tilt. If the US is going to do anything in this, they need to get out of the gate early, get the point and get out of group and into the sweet sixteen. That process, if it is to happen, starts by beating England tomorrow. England is a little beat up and a lot cocky; they are ripe. The Yanks must put a clamp on Wayne Rooney and Landon Donavan must step up and Jozy Altidore must hold up. Game on. Above and beyond this opening match, the smart money is on Spain or Brazil taking the cup. Germany is down, but always dangerous; the Netherlands is the hot longshot if you are in a betting mood and feeling loose.

Next up is some real football. You may have heard, there is a bit ‘o shuffling afoot in the major NCAA football conferences. Nebraska has already officially joined the Big-10 Big-11 Big-12. the Colorado Buffaloes have already joined up with the PAC-10. Ralphie and the Buffs hooking up with my homeboys, the PAC-10, is fine by me. I went to graduate school in Boulder for a year and a half; it is a beautiful and wonderful town and university. Gotta love a place where the restaurant in the student union building is named after a cannibal and Vail, Copper, Mary Jane and Breckenridge are all within 90 minutes or so bed to slope. So I Read more

The Last Days Of May Trash

Now that the Top Hat is back in BP style, I constantly think of this when I hear the term “Top Hat“. Oh well, whatta ya gonna do? Beer Thirty, that’s what!

Lots of junk to blather about, only a few of which are Los Suns hosting the pinche Lakers, baseball (look out, here come the amazing Mets and Sawx), college baseball is in the playoff run, something called the Stanley Cup is supposedly being played, although you would hardly know it here, and early tomorrow morning the Turkish Grand Prix goes off. Crappy cookie cutter track that makes for forgettable racing. Don’t know why the Circus stops in Turkey.

Hoop it up, and I will be along with a couple of real posts in a bit.

Trash Talk: Viva Los Suns!!

Shhhhh! Don’t anybody tell Marcy, but I am slipping an unauthorized trash in the mix; kind of like those randy journalists at Gitmo actually using a name, JOSHUA CLAUS, which has been in the public domain and global ether for a long time. I feel so rebellious. Question authority people!

Okay, there is no overarching reason for this trash, just seemed like we been into hot and heavy shit for a while now and some nerves are getting raw. Seemed like letting loose a little might be a good thing.

As you probably know by now, I live in one fucked up and legislatively mental midget state. When you ask these racist morons “what can brown do for you” they basically respond “fuck off and die”. All I can say is, as a native Arizonan who has spent most of his numerous years on the earth in Arizona, this is not what the Arizona I know, grew up in and love is about. Say what you will about Barry Goldwater, and much of the negative connotation of his name has always been overblown, I knew and remember him from the age I first really remember things from – maybe age five or six – and if he were alive he would be blasting the shit out of the idiots behind the current horsemanure. And he would be saying that John McCain is an opportunistic self important and self centered jackass that is only signing on to the current racism anti-brown profiling act because he cravenly thinks it might help him at the moment. Here is a news flash for the uninformed: This is exactly what Barry always thought of McCain.

So, out here in the desert, we are kind of fucked up. Like you didn’t know that after seeing Joe Arpaio, “The Most Cretinous Sheriff In America”, keep getting reelected by large margins. So, we got that going for us. But we also have Los Suns. And they are up 2-0 on San Antonio and are currently ahead [UPDATE – Los Suns Win Los Suns Win!!!] in game three on the Spurs’ home court, although there is time left in the game. The Spurs have been a thorn in the side of the Suns for freaking years. Trust me, I had lower level very good seats for more years than I can count, and Tim Duncan is relentlessly competent. We have been up on them 2-0 more than once and could not seal the deal. The Spurs never lose a game or a series, you have to beat them. And then step on their throat, because like Freddy Krueger, they keep coming back. You gots to admire the affirmative stand Steve Nash, Amare Stoudamire, Grant Hill and Los Suns have staked out on the Anti Minority Asshole Bigot Act. Viva Los Suns!!

Also this weekend is the Spanish Grand Prix. I’ll be honest, Catalunya is not my favorite track; it is a little sterile and cookie cutter corporate for me. Qualifying has not gone off yet, but Hamilton, Button, Schumacher, Vettel and Webber look fast after practice. The race goes off at 8:00 am EST Sunday, with coverage beginning at 7:30 am, all on Speed Channel.

Today’s musical selection is Sun King by the Cult, in honor of Los Suns of course. The Cult could flat out rip in their day. Some critics have said Ian Astbury is the reincarnation of Jim Morrison. I don’t know about that; I do not think there is anything quite like the Reverend Mojo Rising and, if there has been, it was more likely Michael Hutchence.

Mummies And Bunnies Trash

It has been a while since we have taken in the Trash and the natives are restless. So, for yer Easter pleasure, we have a special Mummies and Bunnies edition of Trash. The bunnies, well, they are the official mascot of the holiday weekend of course, and they are absolutely necessary to go down the rabbit holes we have been lately in search of some semblance of our Constitutional rule of law. The Mummies, well, they are a relatively new discovery to me and they kind of fit in with the whole buried alive torture thing. Actually, they are officially known as Here Come The Mummies, and they are one kick ass live act. I have included two songs for your listening pleasure, one live and the other from a live set in a Chicago studio for a radio/TeeVee simulcast show. Enjoy.

Now, for the action, we start off with March April Madness Final Four. The first semifinal game pits the Butler Bulldogs against the Mighty Michigan State Spartans. This seems like a mismatch, but don’t sell Butler short, they are a perennial tournament team, well coached by Brad Stevens, who looks baby faced enough to be one of the players, but has put his team in the tournament all three years he has been head coach. The Bulldogs have some stud players too, led by Gordon Hayward and they play tenacious and disciplined team defense. On the other side stands Tom Izzo and the Spartans who were in the Final Four Championship Game last year, losing to Carolina, and are in the Final Four for the sixth time in the last twelve years. Izzo knows how to coach em up and the Spartans have really gelled in the tournament. It is telling that when their star guard, Kalin Lucas, went down with an achilles in the second round, you would think they were done. Nuh uh, and they win close games consistently. This is in Butler’s hometown, Indianapolis, so they have that going for them (Butler plays their home games just down the road in Hinkle Fieldhouse, a National Historic Register listed building and literally the home of Hoosiers, the real life team the movie is based on and the filming location for the movie). The Spartans are favored by a point; I call it a tossup. Thankfully, there is no riot in Michigan yet!

The second game has Huggy Bear’s West Virginia Mountaineers taking on the Dookies. Coach K and Duke are not newbies, although this particular team has never smelled the rarified air of the Final Four. West Virginia has been a top flite program for several years too, dating back to when they had a different coach that those Wolvereenies in Ann Arbor stole (Big Blue takes all of the Mountaineers’ coaches sooner or later apparently). Another solid and close matchup with the Dookies favored by two. I can see that, Duke looks to have too much speed and shooting and should prevail.

Formula One: As Petro noted, this weekend is the Malaysian Grand Prix. Malaysia is famous for the wet, there is always rain during GP week, and this year looks no different. That’s okay as the wet makes for great Grand Prix racing, and they do not wimp out and stop like those overhyped sissies that drive in circles. Actually rain is good, because otherwise Kuala Lumpur is a fast track with a lot of straights and not great overtaking opportunities. Hamilton, Vettel, Button and Schumacher were fast in practice. The first two races were won by former World Champions, Bahrain by Fernando Alonso and Down Under by Jenson Button. Is it time for Schumi to round into winning form? Nobody roots for Lewis Hamilton anymore, in fact the Aussies actually literally called him a dickhead! Gotta love the Oz. Qualifying is Saturday morning at 4 am Eastern and the race goes off Sunday morning 4 am Eastern; both on Speed TV.