Hurricane Trash Talk
Late start today, had obligations all morning. And now that am back, am also trying to check on some relatives in Naples Florida, which seems to be the anticipated ground zero when Irma hits for real tonight and tomorrow. It is pretty concerning as they are not young and live literally on the beach. Jim White seems to be in better shape, but has been preparing nevertheless. It is quite a storm.
Speaking of ill wind, some blew in Foxborough Thursday night. The Chefs were really cooking and the Pats really were not. Ugly. If they keep playing like that, they are going to lose some more games. Maybe Jimmy Garoppolo’s time has come!
But we are on to the rest of the schedule, so let’s see what’s up. The Cardinals are in Detroit to visit the Kitties. No clue how either team is going to do, which actually makes it kind of an interesting game. The Cards have a solid roster, but it is the oldest in the league, and Carson Palmer has seen better days. Matt Stafford now has the richest contract in NFL history, so he ought be pretty amped up.
There really are not a lot of great matchups for opening week. Seattle at Green Bay is the clear class of the lot. The Colts at the Rams is not. What a stinker of a game. Raiders at Titans might be okay. The rest are just blah.
The other thing going on is the Ezekiel Elliott suspension drama. So far, Goodell ordered a six game suspension, the process was ridiculously lame, and Harold Henderson upheld the suspension in the appeal pursuant to the CBA. Elliott filed suit in Eastern District of Texas literally before the arbitration was completed. Now, by all rights, that action ought be dismissed and sanctions issued against Elliott and his attorney Jeff Kessler for the craven attempt at forum shopping prior to having exhausted the administrative remedies. Thats teh rules in any sane court, but this is Texas and the judge assigned, Mazzant, instead issued an order excoriating the NFL and issuing a restraining order so Elliott keeps playing.
It is really kind of Deflategate redux. It is, though, fascinating if you like the intersection of sports and law. And for those that do, I have some resources for you. The first is the Sports Esquires by our friend Ian P. Gunn. It is not only a great explainer, but they curate all the documents in one place, which is very helpful. For those preferring a podcast, this one at Dan Werly’s joint, The White Bronco, is fantastic. Dan Werly and Dan Wallach are both friends, and they are simply superb, and especially so in this pod on the Elliott case. You can also check out all these chaps on Twitter if so inclined.
Alright, it was a late start this week, so I will cut this short and get it posted so you all can chat it up about all the games. Music by the Scorps, with Rock You Like A Hurricane. Obviously.
The Colts at the Rams? They should give the winner the Al Davis Golden Wallet as the victor of the Civic Extortion Bowl.
Speaking of the Rams, owner Stan Kroenke’s English Premier League team, the Arsenal Gunners, have been having a terrible horrible no good very bad opening to the season. Last Monday, DJ Gallo of The Guardian warned readers that this may not be a simple road bump, but the path of things to come:
Internal links omitted, and much more in this vein follows this opening — none of it flattering to an owner who richly deserves none.
I mean can you possibly imagine a worse game than Colts at Rams??
Buffalo hosting the J-E-T-S! JETS! JETS! JETS! will give it a run for the money.
Sure but one of them will be in first place in the AFC E afterwards.
Respectfully disagree. A “good game” is one that “your” team wins. So, every game is a good game, for someone. Don’t tell me a Patriots game is by definition a good game—they almost always win, what’s the point? Seattle at Green Bay? Why on earth should anyone outside of those two cities care? If all you care about is watching “good football”, then you are a nihilist. You should believe in something, or you will burn in hell.
You clearly believe that winning is the only thing that matters. Good luck with that philosophy of life, because unless your handle masks the fact that you are Warren Buffett, you’ve lost the economic game that says “whoever dies with the most toys wins.”
Me, I’ve seen plenty of good games that my team lost. Then again, I’ve been a Cubs fan for 3+ decades, and you can’t be a Cubs fan that long and think that winning is the only thing.
As for burning in hell, that’s a professional conversation I’ll leave for the pulpit and the coffee hour afterwards when the verdict on my preaching gets rendered.
Apparently a lot of folks agree with you.
A picture is worth a thousand words.
I actually think the Rams had more fans than the 49ers in the second half. Holy shit.
When the Rayduhs go to Vegas, they should just build a warehouse in which to play the game. “We don’t have to pay all those peons, we don’t have to worry about upkeep on some palace that gets used a dozen days a year, we don’t have to worry about parking headaches, and we can just sit back and rake in the tv revenue.”
This poem by Victor Hernandez Cruz has been going through my head for weeks, and I offer it here for Jim and everyone else in the path of Irma:
Click through for the rest, as it gets better from there.
Stay safe, everyone!
Thanks for that, Peterr. I shared it with my daughter, who got a good laugh from it since she is allergic to mangoes and now knows they have at least two ways to kill her.
We have most of our prep done now. If the forecast for our area is still bad in the morning, I have a plan for covering the windows from the inside in one room so we can sleep without fear of flying glass. I really fear for bmaz’s relatives in Naples, the forecast for their area is truly horrific.
For tonight, though, I’m just working on a stir-fry we can reheat tomorrow. Should still be able to do that for lunch. And I’m going to watch Oklahoma and Ohio State. Gotta pull for Meyer to get embarrassed.
CNN keeps saying will be back to Category 4 with a 12-15 foot storm surge for Naples. I can’t even comprehend what that means. Jesus.
Think of it this way, O Desert Dweller: it’s about as far from “not even a breeze” plus “it’s a dry heat” as you can get.
Chiefs fan here. So, this week is ours
After Thursday night, fans of the J-E-T-S JETS JETS JETS spent Friday, all day and all night according to the talk radio feed, stroking themselves to apoplexy contemplating the idea they and the Bills would be playing for first place in the AFC East. Might as well enjoy it b/c it will end soon.
Sadly, Craig Carton was not on the WFAN air to take that self-delusion over the top. Something about “arrested by the FBI”…. Not surprising a JETS fan would get tangled up in a case around an alleged Ponzi-style scheme. Capacity for self-delusion n’at.
I’ve got the Weather Channel on, where one of their dimwits was videoed reporting from some Florida beach town, calf-deep in storm surge and hunched over from the wind, telling us that, indeed, it’s a bad storm. Now, they shift to Naples with another dimwit also reporting while calf-deep in storm surge.
Y’ know, I’d say they might wind up with someone getting killed doing this but for them already getting a couple of their tornado hunters dead while chasing a twister.
I haven’t seen Jim Cantore yet, which means we won’t know which town really gets it until he shows up. Assuming he isn’t spent from days of excitement over Irma and her winds and surge.
The studio talkers are bemoaning their inability to show more storm porn, advising that they would but for the automated reporting stations no longer reporting. Should tell you something, I guess.
My Stillers open with the Brownies in Cleveland, which means my TV gets the fucking J-E-T-S and Bills game, of course. I look upon this opening at Cleveland with some sadness, given that Young Mr. Football’s career ended with a whimper and a messy DV allegation rather than at the bleeding edge of a James Silverback Harrison tackle turning Manziel into debris in a smoking crater. RG3 finding a similar career fate, not a result I am happy about, though having followed an entirely different path there. But for Daniel Snyder, he could have been great. I would expect the Browns to be somewhat better than last year, which isn’t that hard after all. Not a walk for the Black and Gold by any means.
It’ll be interesting to see how the Stillers new additions work out, especially Watt The Younger. And whether Bryant and Bell can approach living up to their hype.
Oh, well. It’s a beautiful late-summer day here, one where I can go outside and do stuff before hoping the Giants’ D can do what a Texas judge wouldn’t – take that woman-beating Elliot off the field. Fun Lucky Whitehead tie-in there, about which some other time.
Later, folks.
Cantore is in Fort Meyers.
Some say that he finds the worst place to be and goes there to report on it. Others says that he’s like a lightning rod and draws it to him.
Either way, I’m guessing that airport gate personnel don’t like to see him getting off a plane. “Oh, no – Cantore just landed. What is going to hit us – floods, tornadoes, blizzards, hurricanes, blistering heat, or some new hell?”
Irma is about 30 miles out from Naples. But they have been getting hammered for hours just by the outer bands. Gonna be some awfully water soaked ground when the big blow arrives in full. 130 mph gust just now on Marco Island.
Scribe “But for Daniel Snyder, he (RG3) could have been great.”
Maybe or maybe not. RG3 never got over being the high school and college hero and figured out how to become an NFL QB. By the end of his first spectacular season teams had figured him out, and that is why he got so badly hurt. Snyder may not have helped, but RG3 went through two coaches in D.C. and Hugh Jackson in Cleveburg. None of them were ever able to get through to him.
RG3 never learned to slide or to get out of bounds to avoid a hit – that is what sidelined him with the Browns. He never learned how to take a prescribed drop so his linemen knew where he was and could defend him. 1 step, 3 steps, 5 steps, mox nix. He scrambled with little pressure, he stood and took sacks with big pressure. He never figured out how to read a defense. He never figured out how to do his receiver progressions either, and his feet looked like Snoopy dancing on his dog house. The ‘Skins were reduced to running short crossing routes so the receivers went straight across his field of vision and got his attention.
I like Snyder about as well as I like Goodell, and that ain’t much. But Snyder wasn’t Robert’s biggest problem, Robert was. In the end what was fatal was that despite tons of talent he had no learning curve.
I fear for my in-laws in Naples. They are not far from the beach. Storm shutters don’t seem like enough, stilts maybe too. Armor to protect from the flying mangoes is a precaution that had never occurred to me.
‘Skins vs Iggles could be an interesting comedy. ‘Skins have what looks like an improved roster, but did not look ready to actually play football in the preseason. Cousins with a big payday should be highly motivated, but has always been a slow starter. We’ll see if Terrell Pryor actually turns into a good receiver and if Josh Doctson actually wants to play football. They lost another high ’16 draft choice last week when Cravens decided he did not want to play.
!@#$%^& NFL. Elliot’s alleged infraction was during college, the local cops did not feel there were grounds to charge him, and the NFL’s own investigator determined the ex-girlfriend was not a credible witness. It is indeed Deflategate redux where Goodell ignored Boyle’s Law describing pressure varying with the temperature of a gas. That has been settled science for at least 300 years.
bmaz, lefty, let us know if/when you hear from your relatives in Naples. The images are really something else, and the storm surge has yet to roll in.
Thank you Peterr. Cell service back this morning. Doing as well as possible, lots of stuff blown around like trees over roads, but they had no major damage.
Wish I could say the same about the ‘Skins, they stunk up the place. Wentz did look good for the Iggles. He may grow up into a pretty good QB.
Glad to hear the good news, lefty.
On twitter, Jim has been posting updates at his place, including this one this morning that ended with a “thumbs up” emoji:
Also this one a minute later:
Bmaz, any word on your relatives?
Yes, much like Lefty’s report. A LOT of stuff to be cleared out in Naples, but their place and cars made it through just fine. Said it was scary as hell, but all intact. Power out still, but they report city and power crews are working their asses off in admirable fashion.
All in all, a ridiculously good report from them considering how hard Naples took it on the chin.
bmaz
What up with your team? We spotted you 10 and appear to still be winning? Does Palmer need a raise?
My team is currently playing the Squawks.
And apparently forgot that Russel Wilson can run.
Well the Raiders O looked like it’s ready and the D is way better than last yr but still needs work.
9ers look about as bad as I thought they would.
If only the 49ers had a quarterback. I wonder where they might find one?
Same for the Colts.
And the Bengals
And the Texans.
And the J-E-T-S.
(And these are just the starters.)
Yes bmz and I was hoping AZ might sign him so he could back up Palmer.
I like the kid and do believe in the right team/coach he could be really good.
I loved watching the 9er game new coach but same problem of getting the plays in on time. Sad.
I hope everyone’s families are safe in FLA.
The quarterback who has won the most games in Cleveland since the Browns returned in 1999?
Ben Roethlisberger. By a mile.
And my Stillers sacked Cleveland’s QB 7 times yesterday. Watt the Younger had 2, and a pick. Nice day at the office.
This Steelers fan smiles.
EW, I think you talk to the olds about moving to Michigan, Florida has been shown to be unsafe.